oooooooooh LA! LA!

friday i wokeup in los angeles and mike and whit left. i woke up and met dodai , hewley, and jaime... for breakfast at my favorite breakfast spot in LA, the griddle... super beautiful people abound whilst eating egg whites and pumpkin pancakes and a debate on whether i was better looking than valderamma. after that we drove down sunset blvd all the way to the ocean to santa monica, where we took naps and watched the waves come in. they took off and i bronzed some more looking at the waves wishing i could surf 'em. i tried my 10x zoom camera pics of some girl a ways off. yes... kinda creepy i know. but her boobs did look nice and her boyfriend looked okay butt kinda dweebish. actually she didn't look that pretty either. i would post the pic, butt i think that's not right.

after that i went to melrose ave and shopped for some t-shirts and a vest was sooooo vikings ... hat night mike, whit, & i went to dinner at some mexican restaurant, the spanish kitchen where mike and i spotted for the first time ever a butt crack two digit cover by the bartender i had a crush on (crush #187 in the world poogene crush rankings) noah met up with us after and we hit the cvs where i first started practing my pirhouette and then we watched battlestar galactica where i kept on asking questions about bsg and mike kept on having to rewind his dvr because i kept on asking annoying questions. it was much fun...

saturday, we woke up and grabbed coffee and smoothies. we were gunna lie down at whit's pool where mrs. furst gave us chocolates who informed me that she is 92 and still dancing. i went to go get the chocolate bars whereupon i was hit with this stench that eroded layers of my epidermis. the chocolate became immediately unedible... then we went to adorable's dope ass house with new pool and stuff and took a dip whereupon al came by from san francisco. whit left the stenchy chocolates in adora's beautiful house in the like 87 degree weather.

we then picked up baby babs and went to los feliz for lunch at home. people say that i would live in los feliz if i lived in los angeles because i was complaining that the women of la are beautiful butt not my type, butt i love them. they said they had tattoo's and were more my type in los feliz, butt after being corrupted by west hollywood women... i dunno. god bless plastic surgery i guess.

then i had to run off to nancy's wedding at the american foreign legion. carson daly was there, jimmy kimmel was there, sarah silverman was there- i didn't recognize any of them but was informed later it was them.... in retrospect i thought sarah silverman was actually jamie gertz.




butt more importantly all these peoples from high school that i haven't seen in a lawng ass time were there and it was really really nice to see katie, catherine, mac, naomi, cindy, monica. took some genie juice and got all loopy... it was super fun talking to mr. dillon who went to the bar with me and asked me what my poison was. i said i still don't drink and then he looked at my green genie juice and said "what's that?" i just smiled and said "nothing".... ate dinner at the wedding and the food could have been the best wedding food i've ever had in my life. funny ass speeches. and then sitting down next to jeffrey bissell was a damn fun hoot. funny guy and we had fun smoking candy cigs at the table. he was really funny.

and it was really really great to see


nancy really really happy marrying rob. they seem wonderful for each other and you can just tell by looking at them that



they are going to last and last and last forever. rob seems great in every way and i am sooo happy for them. i'll even forgive her for not telling me she left new york already.

then i left with antony and olivia with gary to go to the the house party in the palisades which was a plan b to the viking bus which broke down on the previous day....

got to the party and was feeling hella frisky and fun. which was fortunate because earlier in the night i was getting tired and was feeling almost a bit too loopy to drive out there... saw mike and whit, noah, jen, roman, and sandy. super fun turning out the dance floor. one half, baby babs, whit, sandy, and i had so much fun on the dance floor while mike provided the music. epic dance floor moves including a new move where everybody slithers on the dance floor during vincent price's monologue in thriller. dream? dude- i can't believe how much we superabound.

dope party. we ended the night with sky playing guitar singing in some language and babs looking for three hours for her friend while her husband fell down about three times and then looked closely on the ground to see if he could see his wife.

got home at 5:30/4:30 because of the daylight savings and whit and i were making monster noises to the cab driver and then switched back to normal voice while giving directions. some girl was MIA for like 3 hours... call me if you need me to edit the public pics tobes.



super fun crowd just laughing awlll night long.



got home and crashed. woke up and had breakfast at basix... al and whit bolth toad me that during the night i was laughing in my sleep and in return i ate their breakfast... i loooove that! dodai stopped with jeffrey unannounced which was perfect so i could say goodbye to them. then dream and sandy stopped by. we then went to baby babs pool and lied out where roman and sandy stopped by to say bye. then whit, baby babs, and i laughed about everything. about something the way babs and tobes' mom annunciates a word, about my small penis, about hips don't lie, about everyting just laughing.

From halloween los...

next up was gary's bbq, where i was so tired butt practiced my pirohuettes, got loopy said by to antony and olivia and bye to gary. left with baby babs and said good bye to a really good times girl. went to mike and whit's where i packed and we watched something on tv.

fell asleep. i switched my empty oatmeal face wash with whit's full one that i left there last year from kiehl's.

woke up and drove my jennifer convertibles sebring back to lax with al and arrived in san francisco on monday and had to head straight to work..

tired and just need to lay down the facts tonight butt dude. 84 degrees at the beach in los angeles for an epic action slacks packed filled weekend in los angeles. thanks so much to nancy, rob, mike, whitney, baby babs, adora, dodai, hewley, jaime, sandy, al, gary, katie, olivia, antony, jeffrey, and roman for making it a super duper hella fun la weekend.

super super fun times every juan

i loved it out there. so much.

god dammit

so much fun dude.

thanks!

full set of my pics are here: mine, tobesters, slimko's

west side til i die....

hmmm....

here i am on a plane again. i seem to be travelling so much these days that rather than properly preparing for these trips, i almost forget that i'm going. so i pack like 3 hours before i hafta leave and i've no idea what i packed. this trip is out west to both san francisco and los angeles, for two different weddings, and halloween weekend in LA and the actual night in SF. i have a slick ass tumi carry on size luggage thing and i'm supposed to fit my halloween costume, wedding suit, two pairs of cowboy boots and all my toiletries?

this was a hectic pack. still don't really know what i packed, butt i think i'm cool.

exciting week ahead for me. tonight i hope to land and then possibly meet girlhattan in LA at luchavavoom, the strip bar mexican wrestling place in la, and then friday i might call mogul and go surfing or i might shop at the thrift stores, saturday i need to make my trasvestite viking costume for the viking bus, saturday evening/night is nancy dillon's wedding, saturday nighty night is the viking bus, sunday is probably recovery and what not, sunday afternoon is gary's barbecue in the hollywood hills, monday morning i fly out to sf where i am going to spend the week working, burrito eating, getting mad loopy, hanging out with all my brethren, spending time with the fams, next week i go to one of my favorite people in the world's wedding andy shinstain in mill valley and do all that and finally i go home next sunday.

that's my shit.

as far as this airplane ride, i think i have to go pee. would you say you are a window or aisle person? i am most definitely a window and for obvious reasons i think i am attracted to people that prefer window over aisle. i think you can tell a lot about a person whether or not they are window or aisle people. if they are middle people then i guess they are insane which is kinda cool in a weird way too... anushow i love the window, butt i love soda- so i drain like 7 cans of soda and then i gotsta piss real bad right now and the aisle and center dudes are sleeping. shit.

flying united. getting more miles. i hope i make premier again this year although i've really no idea what advantage it really provides. i also need to know when you rent a car on a credit card which insurance you can turn down because the of cc coverage.

the lakehouse is the movie. for a while sandra bullock wasn't making a lot of movies and the skies felt so empty without her. it's good to see the requisite bullock movie is back on.

not sure if i like my seating buddy on this flight. there was a slight macho knee push-of-war to determine where the legspace bounderies should be. fortunately i feigned sleeping and there was nothing he could do. i do like him because when he was finished reading he turned off his light which i was kinda mooching off of to read my skymall (LOVE that skymall shit! best products in this ish are ipod toilet paper roll docking station player and artificial royal palm christmas tree) so when he turned off his light i looked up as if to say "what tha...?!?!? and he said i'm sorry! that was real nice. butt what i don;t like is that he is in the mids and he is taking up both left and right arm rests for the past three hours. no. not cool mr middle man. and then when she's passing me my sammich and diet coke, i'm at the window.... you tha middle man! do what the middle man do and relay my shit biotch! all this and i still threw away his plastic cup and lifted his trAy while he was sleeping.

i'm such a saint.

so mad i hafta check in my ultra slick tumi t3 luggage just because i gots like my new kiehls products in there because some a-hole tried to make a bomb out of anal lube.

me and gingi had an exhausting talk on my car ride over to jfk. i hope i'm learning and not being too much of a jerk like i have in the past. i'm trying to be as porkchop would say emotionally honest, butt i really can't commit to it in actions and it's tearing her up.

can't get tooo personal on this here thingy.

anushow. i'm excited about this trip. should be non-stop fun.

i'll see you soon!

fart in your mouth!

poo!

shit!

addendum. so my plane neighbors woke up. the have an around the world ticky and they are actually both window people butt changed their tickies because they wanted to leave early. the are flying to melbourne from vienna butt west because of their ticket, so their trip is non-stop plane for two whole days.... rough. they are on a tennis tour because you see she is actually a tennis pro and doing some research a very very good one at that.

anushow. she is alicia molik and she was australia's #1 and the world's #8 player two years ago before she caught a virus which affected her balance. she was a very cool girl and her coach is stellar as well. i take back what i said, i was just cranky. they are very beautiful people. he's actually patrick rafter's best friend. wonderful, beautiful people. alicia's story is going to be a beautiful one, once she comes back on top. i know she will. good luck alicia.

i got out of the airplane and picke up my bag, got to hertz where they convinced me that a convertible was cheaper than my compact. wrong. plus all the insurance and taxes make a car not that affordable, butt once i got in the car and dropped the top and drove through LA, everything was golden.

i raced to taco bell which i don't like that much because they are pro pepsi, butt i did the drive through which i haven't done in like 10 years. it's so much fun. it's like an amusement park ride.

got to mike and whit's in west hollywood and talked, then went to meet girlhattan at roscoe's chicken and waffles where i had fried chicken livers with maple syrup, tabasco, and ketchup.

okay...



now good night for reals.

poo!

go mickie...

last night was fuuun.

full set of pics are here



after work i ran over to the gymnasium to work a lil bit on me back and my pythons. then i headed into afdy where for the first time in like 6 years of taking the class i'm beginning to have a crush on some of the regularos. i had to bail on afdy before the circle because i had to hurry up- this is a blessing and a curse because that circle makes or breaks my week. i have yetto dance in the circle since i killed it two weeks ago. and now with all the crushes in el clase, it's even scarier and shit. you know what's weird? in any class during the stretches, like when you are supposed to turn your head one way to stretch your neck and the person next to you is doing it the wrong way. is it weird to keep looking at her for the rest of the stretch? is that universally awkward to keep looking at that person who is doing it the wrong way when your eyes lock during the turn your head side to side maneuver?

anushow pickedup gingi and we got dressed. she really did look cute in her raggedy ann. and then stopped over to see bradass and amy at hearth which i recommended to them because i love it and i really like the chef who's computer i fixed once for a dinner trade. he's a great guy and phenomenal chef his gnocchi is the best i've ever had.. go get it. great to see bradass and amy. i love them. we talked about shitting and cleanses. i need to go to hawaii to surf and cleanse next year fsho...

anushow, after seeing bradass and amy we rolled over to finnerty's to meet up with our leader for the night micksters... posse was in full effect ass she organized a fun little tuesday get down to go see nightmare before christmas in 3d at union square.

really fun and mayhemmy and we took over the theater with some of my favorite people in the world that i don't usually see at the same time. like i rarely see weird naked foreign guy, jonny con carne, and one half in the same outing unless it's like my bday. and micksters organized it and then left during the moobie because she looked like this.

i hope everyone paid her for their tickets...

con

that's why i lubber. i lub you micksters

From nightmare bef...

and am sad you are leaving for austin. but for you and weird naked foreign dude, i really

From nightmare bef...

think it's pretty fuckin awestome in austin!

what else...

it's been a while.. umm- RIP cbgb's i hardly knew ye, butt i respect everything you ever stood for. as i rode my bike past it and sawr all the graffiti, even though i have no affinity or personal experiences with you guys to mention, my eyes watered up.

saw thaddeus phillips (la mama extended family) in his fantastic play at the new york theater workshop

saw our la mama's tooth of crime where artie did wonderful... went to the party the next night and saw the badass sam shepard himself paying homage to ellen which
went to my ceo's pre-wedding celebratory festival where i wussed on giving a speech.

that's it.

i'll try to be better.

oh yeah. i may have kissed a woman around 55.

later!